West by God Virginia

West Virgina was a unique state to drive through. I've only ever spent limited time there so there were a couple things that surprised me. The biggest of which was the fact that there were so many nice ass cars on the road. I feel like we couldn't drive a whole mile without seeing a new Corvette or a Porsche or a BMW. I couldn't believe the number of cars we saw that were either really nice sports cars or really nice brand new trucks. I don't know what they do out in West Virgina, but apparently they do it well or the cost of living is so low that they can all afford nice cars. Nice cars in which people drive like assholes. I don't think I saw a level of shitty driving on the trip quite as much as I experienced in WV.

Second thing I'll always remember about West Virgina is how hard and steep some of the turns on the highways were. The turns in Arizona and New Mexico that were semi-twisty with elevation changes were all heavily labeled with warnings. Those same turns in West Virgina would not even make the cut, they would be considered runts and the people who feed turns in the road would let the western turns starve to strengthen the herd…I took that analogy wayyyy to far. But driving through West Virgina was fun, at any moment there was likely to be an incredibly difficult to maneuver turn, and most of the ones that were unlabeled, would have had skulls and x's in the states further west.

The third thing I noticed was a little franchise that we saw in the Western part of West Virgina, West West Virginia, called Tudor's Biscuit World. They advertised heavily and to be honest it was difficult to resist the allure of Biscuit World. I mean you would assume that the place would have the best biscuits ever, maybe even biscuits from all across the globe, and exhibits of illegal or discontinued biscuits. Maybe there were other restaurants where you go in and order a biscuit and they tell you that they don't have them but you should go knock on the door of that abandoned kitchen down the street and ask for a man named Rod who knows a guy who might be able to hook you up. Someone got tired of these illegal biscuit operations and decided to bring all of the laws and rules governing biscuits under one roof to provide the customer with the largest and best selection of street legal biscuits in the world. Whatever the case, Tudor's Biscuit World's always seemed to be next to a strip club, or a porn mega store, or an adult bookstore. I'm thinking this is a great thing, I mean they can share grease, and you can go have your fill of biscuits and head to the sex shop (or the other way around you pervert). I mean I wouldn't have thought that adult industry goes hand in hand with biscuits but hell it looks like it was working fine in West Virgina.

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